It's been a long time (please ignore the previous title)

I have discovered something amazing... the chat rooms. Even though some people may think they are for disperate people... they arent you can meet alot of great people on there ..... and maybe a few not so great people, i have made alot of friends and I spend alot of time there.



There are alot of themes for themed rooms and u can go into either one of them.

Well, thats where I have been most of the time, and if you were wondering what chat room it is it is called Yahoo chat, yo should try it out sometime

I't been a long

Try this out (i hope this works)

Your soul is bound to the First Totem, Ares:
The Dove.
Ares appears as a pearl dove. She embodies
love, peace, balance, and devotion. She
is associated with the color pearl, the season
of transition, and the element of love. Her
downfall is idolization.
You are most compatible with Wolves and White
Stags.

Which Animal Spirit Totem Are You?
brought to you by

What to do

I was at an office today where alot of different people go to (the Health and Welfare office). Well I was just sitting down waiting for my name to be called and then a woman comes out from somewhere and sits next to me and she is crying for I dont know what reason and then she starts talking not knowing if she is talking in her phone or if she has some problems... in the mean time I am looking around the room wondering if anybody else is looking and wondering about this poor woman, I thought she was talking to some imaginary person or something, but she was looking at a woman right across the way from her looking straight at her and saying all these things to her as if she was actually listening. Then she started talking to me and I wasnt sure what to do and I asked her who she was talking to and she pointed out the woman she was talking about. Then the woman started to recognize her and came towards her and said she didnt recognize her because her appearance had changed. They started crying and hugging and the young woman appologized for her past behavior ect. ect., it was the most bizarre experience I had ever gone through... and hope to never go through again. And as I walked out to the outdoors I noticed a police car in the front... I thought this day is getting more bizarre. Anyway, I honestly didnt know what to do with older woman that was crying... she even took some medication, I want sure if she had mental problems or what. But then she was called back and that was the end of that. Then the young girls fiance was concerned, because I heard him say it made her stressed to talk to the older woman.

I'm gabbing again, I hope I made some kinda sense in what I said. I just basically told it as I remember it.

SO VERY SAD

I HAD A VERY SAD AND EMOTIONAL DAY TODAY (THURS.). I DON'T KNOW WHAT SET IT OFF, BUT I FELT VERY DEPRESSED AND LONELY LIKE NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME OR EVEN CARES. I LAID DOWN IN MY BED WITH THE COVERS OVER MY HEAD TRYING TO ESCAPE FROM IT ALL, BUT IT DIDN'T WORK. I HAD NEVER FELT THIS DEPRESSED EVER THAT I CAN REMEMBER AND THAT KINDA WORRIED ME. I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO TELL MY HUSBAND, I JUST WANT TO BE LOVED AND VALUED LIKE I AM SOMEONE VERY SPECIAL. AND BE ACCEPTED FOR WHO I AM NO MATTER HOW HOW FLAWED I AM, AND I AM FLAWED I JUST WISH I CAN CORRECT IT.

I KNOW I MAY NOT MAKE ANY SENSE, BUT THIS WHOLE DAY DIDN'T MAKE ANY SENSE.

One Step Closer

I am one step closer to going back to college. I opened my e-mail this afternoon and noticed a message with an attachment.... the first thing I thought of was VIRUS... but I took a chance (gasp!) and opened the message (not the attachment...yet) and noticed who it was from, the college that could change my life for the better. I am going to try to get my Medical Transciptioning Certificate and am going to do it online. I can get this done in 9 months (I hope) and I can do this work from the comforts of my home while the kids are at school and even when I travel.

I just hope I'm smart enough to do this... because my college history isn't all that impressive because I do have a learning problem and I believe it is holding me back from my full potential of learning ANYTHING. But I need to at least try. The only problem is it does cost money and that scares me... I'm just worried that I will not do the courses justice, but you won't know until you try..... right?

So I am going to go through all the applications and see if the college will even accept me and then I need to hopefully find out if I can even get financial aid. So I guess I'm going to go through with it.... which is what I want.....

Wish me luck, I'm sure going to need it.

My Hair

Yes this is about my hair... well I did something to it that I haven't done to it in a long time. I colored my hair.... red, it actaully looks pretty good and my husband seems to like it. I hope is stays red for a while. My husband is surprised that I wasn't born a red head because I do have fair skin and I have green eyes, but sometimes we need to do some changes to the way we think they ought to be (if that makes any sense). Well my hair looks good and I think I will try to keep it this color.

My daughter

I just got back from taking my daughter who is 4 yrs. old from her weekly Speech Therapy and she is doing quite well... we are thinking she has Developmental Autism, which includes sensory problems with the mouth and hands and the feet (but the feet arent as bad as the other two). She basically can only eat food that is very smooth, she cant have textures or anything that she can 'feel' on her tongue. She also has other therapy that she goes through such as Developmental and Occupational Therapies. Yes it's exhausting but it needs to be done. I just wish I could do more.

It Acually Rained!

It actaully rained yesterday (Saturday), it hasn't rained here in months. Even though it was down-right cold it was a nice change to see the ground wet and the air being cleansed.

The best thing about rain is that we can be in our home with our family safe and dry knowing that our family is safe from the wet outdoors... even though the oldest is in his room watching a movie, but he is home safe and our two daughters are playing in the living room, our children are home safe... yes, I know I mentioned the word 'safe' several times in this passage, but can you really say it enough when it comes to the children?

That is the best thing about the rain... knowing that the whole family is safe at home warm and comforted and we as parents can feel content knowing that.

A Windy and Cold Day

Ok, I woke up this morning (finally) and realized it was going to be a cold day, but I wasn't expecting it to be windy. We keep complaining how hot it is during the summer and BAM! here comes the cold weather without a warning.

My husband and I went to lunch today and I knew it would be just cold so I wore my flip-flops and a short sleeve shirt, boy talk about a rude awakening I froze just walking from the van to the restaraunt. And we have our windows open at home (for a very good reason) and its it is cold in here. You may wonder if I have a point to all this... I really dont know if I have one or not. Its just cold here and I want the warmth back, I guess the point I have is there is no happy medium with anything.... hey I guess I did have a point after all.